I don't remember the first time that I saw Keith, but I will never forget the last. He went back to Missouri after spending a couple days with us at Christmas vacation. When he left he tried hugging me. He told me that I'm his "bro" and that he should hug him. I let him hug me, and didn't hug back....
In the beginning, we were pretty good friends. We had our neighbors, Augie, Andy, Pat, Ben, Jason, Brian, Ashley, Wade, Jenny, and Missy. We lived on one of the biggest younger generation blocks in the area. For the most part we were all close. The main group was Keith, Augie, Pat, Andy, and I. This was a closely knit group structured by the area of which we lived.
We played, that's what kids do, and we slept. We were babysat by the Hansens, and always knew them. Shawn, Scott, and Sherri. Justin and Angie also were babysat there, and we played with them. These were the rest of the people that we came into contact with, for the most part. Keith immediately took off. This guy was going to be the king at popularity no matter what it takes. I remember us fighting over who Augie's best friend was! Keith or I had to be it. At the end, it turned out Augie and I had more in common, but in the early going, Keith wanted to be just like Augie.
Keith and I didn't really do a whole lot together much when not home, except for in the mornings at our babysitters house...we'd go outside and throw rocks at Scotts window to wake him up. We wanted to play. We hated taking naps. I couldn't sit still. Keith could doze in an instant. Keith was my baby, and I loved him. We had fun.
As the years went by, Keith showed me that he was athletic too. He played Baseball, basketball, and football. We even tried wrestling once, but I didn't like it, and neither did Keith. He liked skateboarding a lot when he was little. Tony Hawk was one of his idles.
Keith would always beat me in basketball for some reason, and I don't know why, cause I thought I was better. It upset me. Later on, he gave up cause I got too good for him, but it was a challenge.
Then Keith started to get into trouble. He was in jail on four occaisons. He was a trouble maker. However, when we were alone, he told me how he'd always be here for me and if I ever needed anything, that I could come to him. Keith was a much different person. Although I didn't get to sleep with his rap blasting the foundation, I did care about him. He showed me more than I saw from him anywhere else at home.
Then, he broke my jaw. I couldn't believe he kicked me over a nintendo game. I couldn't believe I couldn't close my mouth! He kept apologizing, and I couldn't stop crying. This must have been the second worst cry I ever had. I never imagined pain of that magnitude. I had to have surgery, and Keith made fun of me, but still apologized.
That Summer, he was ordered to live with my dad for a year, so I was like yeah, get him out of here! Things became a lot more quiet. He came home in Summer before the school year started, and that's when we had the flood, he ended up staying an extra day becaue of that. I didn't talk to Keith for months. Then he came down for Christmas, and we played games with our best friends, Josh Walsh (Keith), and Justin Musil (mine). Then he left, and I refused to give him a hug. It wasn't until February, the day before my birthday, that we started talking again. On February third, 1999, I talked him into downloading ICQ so I could talk to him. We talked so much too. We argued about the past and all sorts of things. I never forgave him for breaking my jaw though. Then, He got in trouble at school for making the dumbest tape I could think of for a class, and got suspended. So I wrote in an e-mail to friends how dumb he was...then I went to bed while wathcing Jurassic Park. It couldn't have been too much later that I heard my mom screaming....I thought she had a bad dream, so I fell back asleep. Then she woke me up, "My worst nightmare has just come true," she said. "What," I mumbled. "You're brother is dead!" I love you so much Keith. I miss you so so much everytime I think of you I want to be a better person. You're my inspiration...my everything, and my only reason for living is to live for you. What I accomplish in my life is all going to be devoted to you. My only brother, gone...I can't help to surpass the crying I had from my jaw thinking about you.
I forgive you Keith...I love you.
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